Christmas Card to my big sister

Funny. Every. Time.

Hey sis!

My sister does not read this but I think her friends do.  Her friends think I am both hilarious and crazy which are both true. They also have a hard time believing that we came from the same parents, which is reasonable.  

We have very little in common. My dad used to always say, “If Christy is our daughter, then who is Stacey?” I don’t know, Pops. I just don’t know.

She’s not a reader, my sister. Christy has read about four books in her lifetime. And while she was in school and had to do a book report of any kind, I am pretty sure my mom read all the books for her.

Also, her favorite band is Train. She exercises and runs and shit. She enjoys painting rooms. She’s a republican. She tailgates at high school football games. She loves Christmas music… none of these things say “Stacey.”

Christy is four years older than me which, in my opinion, is the perfect amount apart for two siblings. We only went to the same school for two years, we never liked the same boys or went to the same parties and the only thing we ever really fought about was clothes. And that stopped once dad put a lock on my closet door. Heh heh. Because Christy didn’t just borrow clothes, she altered them to her liking whether you wanted her to or not.

I was the annoying younger sister from time to time, though. She was my older sister and I thought she was cool! I could be remembering this wrong, but she never really seemed bothered by it. She was always protective and supportive despite me never wanting to leave her side until I got old enough to realize she was a complete dork, which now just endears her further to me.

She is a great sister and always has been despite her constant need to tattle on me. Most sisters like to confide in each other and trust each other with everything, yeah, not my sister. My first piercing, she told on me. My first tattoo, she told on me. I voted for Obama, she told on me. She’s a terrible secret keeper, though she has gotten better lately. At least I think she has, time is going to tell on that one…

I give her a lot of shit for being dumb but this is really only because being smart is the only thing I have on her. She has always been smaller, better looking and she has a better personality. Well not so much better as nicer.

However, Christy and I do share a lot of the same qualities:

We are both of the mentality that we are awesome and no one could tell us differently. As I mentioned in the Christmas Card to my parents, we were raised this way. We get it from dad, mom could use a little more self assurance. If you don’t think the most of yourself, how do you expect anyone else to? You know that saying that if you don’t love yourself, how can you love anyone else? Yeah, Christy and I never had that problem.

We love sweets and candy.  When we were old enough to drink legally (I think we were legal…) every Sunday morning (more than likely hungover) we would lay on the couch, watch TBS and eat candy and TCBY. It was pretty much the best. I honestly couldn’t tell you what we watched but we have never really had the same taste in movies…or music…or anything, really. But we both love chocolate covered cherries.

We are both criers (I think I am worse than she is). We are both pretty creative in our own ways. We both have big, though vastly different, personalities. Neither of us has a shred of modesty. We like to make stuff. We love cookies. It’s a bunch of small things, really that add to a lot.

Merry Christmas, sis! Thank you for always being a pretty solid big sister. Thank you for being crazy enough when you were a teenager so whatever I did paled in comparison. And also (I know she was waiting for this) thank you for being so cool in high school that it made me popular by relation…even though I wasn’t really popular. But I was Christy Garrett’s little sister, so thanks for being legendary, ha!   

(Also, thank you for letting me live in your house and eat your food and take your hot water and your laundry detergent and your cable)